Life consists of many unpleasant life-altering changes. We accept job offers we normally would not because we have to eat and pay bills. We walk around with a bad hair-do for several months because the beautician of choice made a mistake. In relationships, the “man of our dream” turns out to be the monster under the bed. We press on from these unwanted areas in our lives with hope for a brighter future. However, what happens when an unwanted way of life affects our children? What if you were married for more than five years and with a blink of an eye you are a single parent. Within this single parenthood life style, your children must live in two different households. Your children now resides in two different homes due to joint custody.
This transition from having both parents under one roof to living under two separate roofs cannot be an easy process for the children of broken homes. Regardless of the age, these children will rebel at any provocation. They experience depression and often feel anxious about every day events. Withdrawn and unhappy, children within joint custody setting feel pulled at both ends. Can they show loyalty to both parents without betraying one? Their one and only hope is that their parents will not divorce and they verbalize this wish repeatedly with the demand – “Why can’t you stay together?”
This question is a valid one. When you witness firsthand what children go through when their parents divorce you cannot help but wonder why must this couple separate? Children go through so much during a divorce that parents should consider remaining together. Of course, this is not an avocation to remain married to an abusive partner. It is instead a reconsider suggestion, an encouragement to work harder at remaining married, at maintaining a safe uninterrupted environment for the children.
There will be times when divorce is inevitable and joint custody happens. Since, the children can easily become the victims both parents owe it to the children to ensure that they minimalized the painful process. Parents must put aside their differences, their animosity, their anger, their resentment, and work together for the good of the children.
Read more about what happens to children when their parents refuse to resolve their differences. Understand the joint custody process and see its effects on the children as they learn to operate in two separate households. Draw your own conclusions as to whether it is better to remain married for the children.